Dear You: I Think I’ll Become a Comedian

Dear You,

I’m graduating college in about a month, so I’ve been reflecting on my past and my future. I’m starting to think I’ll become a comedian. And I don’t mean by choice. I mean that I’ll just be doing serious grown-up things when I’ll suddenly realize I’m a comedian doing stand-up. The change will be slow and imperceptible; I’ll start off doing workshops or short lectures on English and writing, then slowly my audience will expand and then, there it is, I’ve suddenly become a Comedian talking about English and the finer points of Grammar.

I suppose this would be an alright thing to turn into; there are worse things to be –or not to be– which means I’ll accept my fate and keep moving along. My one hope is that I’d at least attain enough notoriety to appear on QI with Stephen Fry someday.

Well, I hope things are going well with you,

Until the Previous Time We Meet,

December: Expanding the Market

Dear You,

I started selling books last week, and already I have 35 spoken for. It’s been an interesting experience in marketing and learning not to undervalue myself like I tend to do. My book is retailing at $17.99 and I know she’s worth it because I’ve put in time and labor to create this piece of fiction; I’ve spent days editing and altering lines and letters, and enduring this uncertainty and second guessing of publishing a first novel.

That being said, December is now available online through the Tate Publishing website, so be sure to look at it.

Paperback copies are $17.99 plus $5 shipping and handling, and e-books are $13.99.

And tell everyone you know (and don’t know),


Until the previous time,


December Comes in June This Year

The release date for December has been set for June 2014; I’ll the specific date later. For the time being I thought I’d publish a picture of the book and show that, yes, this book is more than words on a screen.

Later I'll add a picture of myself.

A picture I took of the proof copy of December. I think the cover folk did well.

December: Marketing

Dear You,

I have, at long last, entered the marketing segment of the publishing process which means I must answer a multitude of questions about niche markets, and re-assess my reasons for writing in the first place. I have to ask myself: Why would I read it? Why should I read? What makes it interesting? What’s the purpose for selling this book? Why did I write the book? Why is it worth sharing? What motivation do I have for writing and selling this book?

Thinking about these things I’m remembering how December started. It started as a kind of challenge from my parents, namely my father, to capture my perceptions of society as a 19-year-old boy. I kept regular journals at the time, so the project started as journalistic entries and slowly evolved into this fictionalized cascade of internal monologue.

I think December is worth selling because it is entirely about an individual’s perception of the world, and this individual is “different” from other people. What makes this novel interesting is that, apart from social perceptions and ideations of society, the novel shows a divide between thought and action by inverting the typical italicizing pattern in a style similar to stage writing. That is, the physical actions and exterior actions are written in italic, while the interior monologue is plain text.

My motivation, then, for selling and writing this book -aside from efforts towards world domination- is to create a text that will provide historians and sociologists insights into the perceptions of we who have lived in the 21st century.

That’s what I’ve thought so far on these questions, and they are subject to change, but for now I hope all is well with you and that you’ll find a chance to examine my book and assess what meaning (or lack thereof) lies within the pages.

Your friend,



One Hundred Words for Post One Hundred:

It began with a perspective; a single photograph intent on capturing an idea, though which idea is hard to determine. Now, after eight months of writing and posting, that exploration has continued being the theme of this blog, and it has become a blog of scenes and moments grasping for this idea yet, somehow, falling short despite essays and poems, prose and summations, photographs and visualizations stating reasons and observations while always asking for more than idle realizations. But, as with the Shadows who offended, pray in writing these all may be mended.

Response to Superstition

I forgot my keys
A Black Cat crossed my path
So I want to sleep

Maus Represented: An Observation

An observation
The persistence of those few
Who fall low but rise

Lady Dear Lovely

Lady dear lovely, look lazily to me

And smile so tranquil and sweet.

Dare we believe in the idle-ly maybe

Yof strangers who barely could meet?

I’ll Think of a Title Later

Few skills are as undervalued as procrastination. My editor-in-chief, for example, wrote about ways to avoid procrastination, but ignored the possible benefits of academic procrastination.

Though starting with a clear definition of procrastination could be useful, I will save that for the end of the article. I think maybe, that instead, we might think about ways procrastination could be useful when deadlines are getting closer.

Tip the First: Exercise

It can be difficult to remain or get in shape when we have assignments to complete. It is frustrating to realize that all that time we didn’t spend reading could have been used to improve our cardio. The solution is to go to the Fortin Fitness Center.

There, one may spend time on a bike or elliptical, or join one of the fitness classes offered there. This way, homework can be put on hold while taking in some endorphins from exercise. If we’re really ambitious, we could take a magazine or other light reading along to avoid assigned reading two ways at once.

Tip the Second: Cleaning

Like exercise, cleaning is an activity we college students put off, but it’s a useful tool for effective procrastination. We could wash the dishes, tidy the shelves, make the bed, vacuum the floors and do little housekeeping chores to avoid that lengthy essay. This way, our procrastination could satisfy us with a clean living space.

Tip the Third: Television and the Internet

TV and the internet are also excellent tools for procrastination. Blogs, especially, offer interesting and often useful tidbits of information to help pass the time spent avoiding homework.

A blog I read, for example, is by The Bloggess who writes about her life as a woman, writer, and “stuffed animal” collector. And by that I mean she collects unusual taxidermy pieces.

Tip the Fourth: Puzzles and Analogue Games

Games, especially puzzles and brain-games, are excellent ways to procrastinate while doing something good for your brain that isn’t homework. This way, time spent procrastinating can be spent building brain powers that could be useful for future academic projects.

Tip the Fifth: Other Writing/Reading

We students who do like to read and write (when it’s not for class) have another option for procrastination: exploring the world of literature. We could probably read any number of popular books in place of those assigned pages, and avoid tough, scary writers like Eliot.

Alternatively, writers can write blogs, essays, or other works (entire novels, even) about procrastination and its function in society, as a way to put off writing three pages for class.

Now, I suppose I should define exactly what procrastination is, but I think I’ll wait in case I can possibly, potentially, perhaps do a better job the next time I write about procrastination.

Dear You: Puzzles

Dear You,

You’ve told me before that you rather enjoy watching the progression of puzzles coming together, and since I’m uncertain whether you have any to watch “grow” where you are, I thought I’d trace the progression of our most recent library puzzle for you.

The puzzle 2

Here’s day one, the freshly opened puzzle

The puzzle 3 morning 5 march

The morning of the second day, by that afternoon the border was complete.

The Puzzle 4

This morning (March 6) the puzzle was complete. A 300 piece puzzle completed during 20 hours of library operation.

So there you have it. I’ll aim for more progressions for the next puzzle: a 500 piece puzzle called Noah’s Ark.

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